A surprising rainbow
I’ve spent a lot of this last week feeling out of my comfort zone. To be honest, my comfort zone is a lot smaller these days than it used to be with lockdown and social distancing leading me to be a bit of a hermit. What used to be an everyday activity like getting on a train into central London is now so out of the ordinary, when I do have a reason to travel in the mental strength I need is a lot greater and I can end up feeling exhausted and overwhelmed – sometimes before I’ve even left the house!
A few days ago I met a friend to go for a walk round Surbiton. We hadn’t particularly planned where to go so I suggested walking down to the river. It was a lovely day after the storm at the weekend and great to be out of the house. By lovely I meant it looked like it could rain, but it was dry right then and a lot warmer than the weekend. We’d walked all the way down from Seething Wells to the edge of Kingston and I started to turn back up towards Surbiton. That’s what I normally do when I walk down to the river so it didn’t really occur to me to do otherwise. My friend however, wanted to continue along the river a bit further into Kingston.
I don’t know why but I felt really reluctant to go further. I was enjoying being out, I was enjoying spending time with a friend, but for some reason my feet didn’t want to keep going, it was beginning to rain and we’d end up walking back along main roads. I didn’t really see the appeal but the walk was as much about spending time with a friend as it was about the walk itself so I continued on.
As we got towards Kingston College we spotted a double rainbow ahead of us, for all the world looking like there could be a pot of gold in middle of the Penrhyn Road roundabout and maybe another in the Hogsmill River behind it – most unlikely locations! It stopped us in our tracks to take a breath and appreciate the moment.
It struck me later that if I’d turned back earlier, we wouldn’t have been in the right place at the right time to see a rainbow at all, they’re such fleeting moments.
I’m trying to balance my energy and find ways to manage. So some days I can step outside my comfort zone and have a great time, other days it turns out to be too much and sometimes, I choose not to. Those days maybe I’ll miss out on the rainbow but I also know I’m looking after myself. Finding something like a short walk into town unsettling is usually a sign that I have too much on my mind, or I’ve been pushing too hard. They’re the days when I need reminding that maybe a walk is a time to slow down, to reconnect with friends, that I can do more with a little encouragement than I think I can on my own and that when I slow down and relax, I can spot beauty and nature in places where I hadn’t thought to look.